Becoming a mother is more than just ‘adjusting’.

I remember saying to my doctor “I don’t feel blue/down/depressed, I just don’t feel like me”, and she replied “you’re just ‘adjusting’ and you need more sleep”.

But I now know I was in the throws of my ‘becoming’ and this critical transformation period was brushed aside, and I was not prepared to feel so different and to change so deeply. 

I now know it as Matrescence - a profound transformation of woman to mother that affects her on every level; physically, mentally, emotionally, socially. 

And now... if only I knew this, if I only I could have prepared and understood where these changes came from and why... I still would have felt deeply exhausted and not myself, but I would have known why.